Bears vs. Jaguars: Three to Watch for the Bears (this is too funny)
Sounds like the Jags are a franchise in ruin, with despairing fans. Thayer said (in another article) we have to get on this team early. They will roll over if the Bears come out strong. I agree, we need to have a strong start & crush any hopes they may have for an upset.
LINK to the article Bears vs. Jaguars: Three to Watch for the Bears The abortion of talent that is the 2012 Jacksonville Jaguars will give an overall swell effort on Sunday, as they attempt to not look like a Pop Warner team attempting to play with their older brothers against the 3-1 Chicago Bears.
Chicago enters this impending throttling as a 5 point favorite, following an impressive win on Monday Night Football against the Dallas Cowboys. While that may seem somewhat low considering the last two home appearances by the Jaguars have resulted in two losses by a combined score of 54-17, keep in mind Vegas generally spots the home team 3 point home field advantage, so in actuality the true spread is a much more deserving 8 points. Don't be surprised to see that spread go up though, once Vegas actually watches tape of the 2012 Jaguars.
There's not much that can be said about this game, that hasn't already been said about Afghanistan, but since we've made this a weekly series on with it we go. Without any further adieu, here are three things to pay attention to for the Bears as they toy with the Jaguars for a couple of drives, before inevitably destroying them.
1. Fifty Shades of Jay
Quarterback Jay Cutler's play on the field and his perceived whiny attitude off it, have left Bears fans wondering on a week by week basis which guy they're gonna see every Sunday. Is it the guy who completed 75% of his throws for 275 yards and 2 touchdowns, as he did against Dallas this past Monday? Or will it be the train wreck who completed just 40% of his passes for 126 yards and 4 interceptions while being sacked 7 times against Green Bay three weeks ago, while blowing up at his offensive linemen on national television? While even teams like the Rams have been able to give the Bears qb fits this season, he will face a Jaguars defense on Sunday that couldn't put pressure on themselves if they tried. The key to throwing Cutler off his game is pressure, and the Jags simply don't play that type of defensive scheme....or so says the team's broadcasters anyway. Look for Cutler to have a huge day as the flat footed thrower will be able to watch reruns of "The Hills" with his fiance' Kristin Cavallari in the pocket, while waiting for his receivers to come open against Team 'We Play A Cover 2 So Obviously That Deters Us From Being Aggressive Even Though We Finished Ranked 6th With This Very Same Scheme Last Year".
2. The Guy You Should've Given the Money to But Your GM's a P****
The Bears bring to town one of the most dominating defensive players of our time in defensive end Julius Peppers. The former first round pick has been a sack machine since he arrived in the league, and he continues to be the anchor on what is a very talented defensive line. Defensive coordinator Rod Marinelli loves to use Peppers in different ways in order to get him the best match up possible, including lining Peppers up as a defensive tackle at times. If I were Marinelli, I would line Peppers up at defensive tackle all day long, as the Jaguars interior line will likely allow him to seal his Hall of Fame ballot on Sunday. Heading into the game, Peppers has recorded 10 tackles with 2.5 sacks, or 5 less than he'll wake up with on Monday morning. Jaguars fans don't have a lot to be excited about for this game, but from a purely football perspective, be excited at the opportunity to watch Peppers play in person.
3. Peanuts!, Get Your Peanuts!
Charles "Peanut" Tillman leads a Bears secondary that can flat out shut down the opponent's receivers with relative ease when at their best. Through the first quarter of the season, Tillman has 16 tackles, an interception and a pass defended. While those don't seem like gaudy numbers, according to Pro Football Focus teams are completing just 13% of passes thrown to his side of the field. Tillman was a Pro Bowler in 2011 and that level of play has yet to diminish so far in 2012. I don't expect Gabbert to look much towards Tillman's way as the Jaguars still try to explore the secrets of the forward pass, but should he decide to get nuts with it and do so, it may lead to a catastrophic play for the Jaguars offense or as Jaguars fans like to call it, "3rd down".
Last edited by JustAnotherBearsFan99; 10-05-2012 at 10:04 AM.
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Haha too funny. Thank you for posting that, I am thoroughly amused.
The only thing I am worried about is the Jag's run game. I hope the run D is prepared. Perhaps Toe should be active for this game.
Arguing on the internet is like winning the special olympics, even if you win your still messed up.
Restore the roar!
A) If they throw away from Peanut, they throw towards reigning NFC Defensive player of the month Tim Jennings. Bring it.
B)I have always hated "trap games" as a Bear fan. 'Nuff said.
c)We had better just go ahead and sign Melton to an extension between now and Sunday. He's going to be expensive w/ 10+ sacks under his belt.
D)We should go ahead and rest Forte most of the game regardless of score. We should rest Urlacher too, once we get up by 14.
Winston Churchill: "Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak."
"If you're not a liberal at twenty you have no heart, if you're not a conservative at forty you have no brain."
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very nice find, great read.
Another funny one:
LINK to the article Hide Yo' Kids
Hide Yo' Wife
Da Bears Are Coming to Jacksonville! The Chicago Bears are going to obliterate the Jacksonville Jaguars on Sunday. I expect the destruction to be so thorough, so complete, that the Jaguars will begin moving their corporate offices to Los Angeles midway through the 3rd quarter.
The Jaguars are the Atlanta Thrashers of the NFL. Here today, gone tomorrow. And no one will miss them.
Don’t even bother scouring the Week 5 schedule for other favorable matchups. The Bears are this week’s Survivor Pool pick. Let it ride on the team that just humiliated Tony Romo and his squad of Super Bowl pretenders before a national TV audience.
The Bears defense owned Romo so severely, one may have to check Carrie Underwood’s phone records from early Tuesday morning and see how many distraught “I miss you” text messages he sent her, to understand the full severity of Romo’s Bears-induced implosion. I’m setting the over-under of wistful, despondent Romo texts, including a Brett Favre-to-Jenn Sterger-like Prime Time Creeper photo, at 7.5, and I’ll take the over.
But Romo and Dez Bryant’s outright awfulness should not overshadow a Bears defense that has forced 14 turnovers through 3 games, and is coming off a 2-touchdown performance. You could run all the Madden simulations you want, the Bears are not losing this game. Lovie Smith’s Bears teams, when playing at full strength (i.e. NOT with Caleb Hanie), rarely, if ever, play down to inferior competition. Rather, they punish them. And this Jaguars team is unequivocally inferior.
This confident, capable Bears defense will look to shut down Maurice Jones-Drew, who accounts for, oh, 98.7% of the Jaguars’ flaccid offense. MJD’s asinine tweet questioning Jay Cutler’s toughness after Cutler hurt his knee in the 2010 NFC Championship game may serve as an additional motivator for a defense that is already primed to stop the run, and salivating at the opportunity to feast on Blaine Gabbert’s inexperience. I predict 81 all-purpose yards for MJD, with no scores, and a sub-250 yard, zero touchdown, 2 interception performance out of Blaine “The Mane” Gabbert.
Offensively, the Bears will look to build on the productive passing attack they unleashed in Dallas, against the Jaguars 20th ranked pass defense, yielding 254.5 yards per game through 4 weeks. Cutler and Marshall re-discovered their chemistry, hooking up for 138 yards a touchdown in Dallas. I foresee more of the same, facing a secondary that surrendered 244 yards and 2 touchdowns to Andy Dalton and his fleet of formidable receiving weapons in Week 4.
Cutler may have found two new toys in unlocking the devastating Devin Hester Double Move, and Kellen Davis, who produced a highlight reel circus catch shortly before wiping out two defenders with a pick on Brandon Marshall’s 4th quarter touchdown. Hester’s speed and Kellen Davis’ massive frame are secondary weapons that could turn a potentially explosive offense into a dominant one, if properly developed and exploited.
I believe the running game will serve as more of a complementary piece this week, as Mike Tice looks to build on the momentum Cutler and his possibly-gelling offensive line showed in Dallas. Cutler will explode for 318 yards and 3 touchdowns, to Marshall, Jeffery, and Forte, and the Bears will add a rushing score from Michael Bush.
I used to like the Jaguars (as an AFC curiosity, never interfering with my Bears devotion) back in my na´ve Root for the Underdog days. I even had a Mark Brunell jersey, who became a hero to all semi-athletic lefthanders, like myself. But those na´ve days are dead and buried. The Jacksonville Jaguars are a terrible franchise, and should roll over for their Super Bowl contender overlords from Chicago.
Last edited by JustAnotherBearsFan99; 10-05-2012 at 03:15 PM.
And one more:
LINK to the article Three to Watch for the Jaguars
(If You Must Watch the Jaguars) 1. Throw There, MotherF***er!
Jaguars hand off specialist Blaine Gabbert has improved his completion percentage of the forward pass from last season's roughly 50% which was good for dead ass last in the NFL, to a fantastically below average 55% currently, good enough for 28th in the league or an improvement of four whole spots in the statistical rankings of players who complete forward passes. There are still 32 players in NFL games who attempt forward passes regularly, just fyi. While I'm all for the approach that the wingback should be the lone receiving option when attempting forward passes of the football, it appears in the modern NFL game it would behoove Gabbert to perhaps attempt a forward pass to either his flanker or split end at a depth of at least 10-15 yards beyond the scrimmage line. Sometimes, according to recent publications by known scholars on the matter, the depths of the thrower's forward pass can reach measures of even 20 or, and I chuckle at the notion, 25 YARDS! Can you believe that? I know I simply cannot fathom such a thing. If young Gabbert could somehow master such sorcery, why perhaps the Jaguars offensive players may provide the team with just enough points in their column to render a spirited show on Sundays forth.
2. Pocket Full of Kryptonite
Other than left tackle Eugene Monroe, the offensive line for the Jaguars has played at a level somewhere between Terry Parker High School's jv scout team and Anna Nicole-Smith's corpse. The team is currently working with two undrafted free agents at left guard (Mike Brewster) and right tackle (Cam Bradfield) who are somewhere between average and Fox News covering a car chase; a center who is on his last days in the league; and a right guard who could be very good if his consistency didn't rival Amanda Bynes' sobriety. I don't know if there's an answer on the team right now that could fix the sieve that is the team's o-line, judging by the fact Gene Smith is still GM there's likely not, but something has to be done in a hurry before the team risks Gabbert deciding enough is enough and going all "The Last Boy Scout" on us.
3. Beast Mode
Yep, that's right friends, we're wrapping things up with the friggin' fullback. Hell, why not watch Greg Jones anyway it's not like the offense is any good that you'd want to watch any other individual sans MJD. Plus, if you keep an eye on "Beast" long enough, you'll watch him rack up his team lead in receptions while also looking for someone to maim on the opposing team. It's not often NFL players these days are legitimately scared of another player, and it's comforting to know at least something in a Jaguars uniform scares the opponent. Greg Jones, everyone, the catalyst of your 2012 Jacksonville Jaguars and future MMA champion.
Oh, if you were wondering what to watch on the defense for the Jags, here ya go...
Last edited by JustAnotherBearsFan99; 10-05-2012 at 03:31 PM.
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All those are awesome...wonder if the mother of that little girl sued that dude, and the owner of the freak out snowman.
Is anyone else going to the game? And where are you going before the game if so?
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