Mike Tice finds an UFA to be our franchise LT. It's all good now guys!
I just hope they can get him ready for Sunday's Green Bay game. His name is "Bippo" and he's been a Ringling Brothers circus performer for several years. Tice assured the sports media yesterday that his skills will map perfectly to allow him to replace J'Marcus Webb.
They do need to find him a better helmet.
LINK to the article
The best thing about the deal is that Bippo will sign to work for bananas, so there is ZERO cap hit for this signing. The McCaskey's are looking into the possibility of building on Mike's idea, to sign a 53-man roster of circus monkeys to save money (Virginia reportedly was thrilled with the idea).
Emery has the entire personnel department's scouting staff, looking nationwide for enough circus monkeys to fill our roster.
Lovie is outraged with this idea. He said the monkeys poop on the locker room floor, and Bippo stole his challenge flag last night, and wouldn't give it up.
Toub, reportedly is depressed about the idea. He said the monkeys are impossible to train on special teams. When he tried to show Bippo how to kick a field goal, he ran up the goal post and pee'd (the monkey, not Toub).
Tice is thrilled with the idea.
He says this may end up being his best offensive line.
He says the monkeys seem more coachable (and remember the snap count better than Webb ever did).
If we beat the Packers on Sunday, that changes everything. Keep your spirits up.