Obama's fate in hell
One day in the future, Barack Obama has a heart-attack and dies.
He immediately goes to hell, where the devil is waiting for him.
"I don't know what to do here," says the devil. "You are on my list,
but I have no room for you. You definitely have to stay here, so I'll
tell you what I'm going to do. I've got a couple of folks here who
weren't quite as bad as you. I'll let one of them go, but you have to
take their place. I'll even let YOU decide who leaves."
Obama thought that sounded pretty good, so the devil opened the door to
the first room. In it was Ted Kennedy and a large pool of water. Ted
kept diving in, and surfacing, empty handed. Over, and over, and over he
dived in and surfaced with nothing. Such was his fate in hell.
"No," Obama said. "I don't think so. I'm not a good swimmer, and I don't
think I could do that all day long."
The devil led him to the door of the next room. In it was Al Gore with
a sledge-hammer and a room full of rocks. All he did was swing that
hammer, time after time after time.
"No, this is no good; I've got this problem with my shoulder. I would
be in constant agony if all I could do was break rocks all day,"
The devil opened a third door. Through it, Obama saw Bill Clinton,
lying on the bed, his arms tied over his head and his legs restrained in
a spread-eagle pose. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she
Obama looked at this in shocked disbelief, and finally said, "Yeah man,
I can handle this."
The devil smiled and said...........
( this is priceless . . . . . . )
"OK, Monica, you're free to go."
Winston Churchill: "Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak."
"If you're not a liberal at twenty you have no heart, if you're not a conservative at forty you have no brain."
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ahahaha, black people cant swim.
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I laughed harder at that than the OP.
Originally Posted by blinddeafmute
Threadkiller's Top 10 List of Osama Bin Laden Death Jokes from Twitter:
10. "The 72 virgins all have headaches tonight"
9. "At least he got to see the royal wedding before he went out"
8. Q: "What color were Osama's eyes?" A: "Blue. One blew this way, one blew that way"
7. "BREAKING: Osama bin Laden to run against Hitler for mayor of hell"
6. "Bin Laden's final words: "I need a house full of Navy SEALs like I need a hole in my head"
5. "RIP Osama bin Laden, World Hide and Go Seek Champion (2001-2011)"
4. "This is good news for the other guys on the top 10 wanted list -- finally they get to move up in the rankings."
3. "God will pass judgment; the US Military simply arranged the meeting!"
2. "They should have captured Bin Laden alive and made him continually go through airport security for the rest of his life."
1. "Osama dead: Donald Trump demands the long-form death certificate."
Ronfld at # 2-4.
I heard the OP joke before, but it was about GW...I guess if hillary ended up running after obama and winning it the joke might lose it's humor..