 Obama jokes |
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 Aug 18 2008, 09:18 AM
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#1
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 Probowler  Group: Members Posts: 9,806 Joined: 14-January 07 From: Sitting at my computer, dumbass. Member No.: 8 DaBucks: 2,185,279,234 Fave Player: TG's brother  |
"After a quick meet-and-greet with King Abdullah, Obama was off to Israel, where he made a quick stop at the manger in Bethlehem where he was born." --Jon Stewart, on Barack Obama's Middle East trip
"Obama's camp initially agreed that the cartoon was, quote, tasteless and offensive. Really? You know what your response should have been? It's very easy. Here, let me put the statement out for you. Barack Obama is in no way upset about the cartoon that depicts him as a Muslim extremist, because you know who gets upset about cartoons? Muslim extremists. Of which Barack Obama is not. It's just a f**king cartoon." --Jon Stewart, on the New Yorker Cartoon controversy "Barack Obama gave a speech in Germany and 200,000 people showed up. There were so many Germans shouting and screaming that France surrendered just in case." --Craig Ferguson "I'm sure you know by now, Jesse Jackson was overheard saying, and I'll put this more delicately, that he wanted to cut Barack Obama's testicles off. And Jesse has been on several news programs the last couple of days, explaining what he meant by those comments. Do you need to explain that?" --Jay Leno "Insiders claim that even though Jesse Jackson supports Barack Obama publicly for president, privately he doesn't like him. You know, it's kind of like Bill with Hillary." --Jay Leno "Jesse Jackson also said he thought Barack Obama was talking down to black people by lecturing on things like fatherhood and being a responsible husband. Jesse thought it was insulting, not only to him, but to his former mistress and their lovechild." --Jay Leno "Barack Obama is now denying that he is email pals with the beautiful actress, Scarlett Johansson. Remember that story? They were saying that Scarlett Johansson and Barack Obama were emailing each other. He says no, it's not true. In fact his exact words were 'I did not have textual relations with that woman.'" --Jay Leno "Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton campaigned for the first time together in Unity, New Hampshire, today. Isn't that cute? Unity, New Hampshire. For real. Their tour goes from Unity to Tolerate, Rhode Island; and Getting on My Nerves, Virginia; and then Crazy Makeup Sex, California." --Jimmy Kimmel "Hey, have you heard this story that Barack Obama and Scarlett Johansson are apparently e-mail buddies? Scarlett Johansson is quoted as saying, 'My heart belongs to Barack Obama.' How about that, huh? Barack's not even president yet, still doing waaay better than Bill Clinton ever did." --Jay Leno "Hillary Clinton said if her pastor had made the comments that Reverend Wright had made, she would have left that church. Interesting distinction she makes. She also says if her pastor had been blown by Monica Lewinsky, she would have stayed." --Bill Maher |
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Aug 18 2008, 09:32 AM
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#2
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 Practice Squad Group: Members Posts: 1,545 Joined: 23-January 07 From: ChicagoLand Member No.: 170 DaBucks: 2,149 Fave Player: Tommie Harris |
Those are great.. Thanks Track.
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Aug 18 2008, 09:44 AM
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#3
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 TD's Spiritual Leader Group: Members Posts: 5,835 Joined: 14-June 07 From: Byron,IL Member No.: 378 DaBucks: 49,956,520 Fave Player: All of them!!!!!! |
QUOTE(trackguy @ Aug 18 2008, 08:18 AM)  "Barack Obama gave a speech in Germany and 200,000 people showed up. There were so many Germans shouting and screaming that France surrendered just in case." --Craig Ferguson ROTFLMFAO........ 
-------------------- It's not my job to blow sunshine up your ass.
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Aug 18 2008, 11:15 AM
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#4
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Probowler Group: Members Posts: 9,806 Joined: 14-January 07 From: Sitting at my computer, dumbass. Member No.: 8 DaBucks: 2,185,279,234 Fave Player: TG's brother |
I started an Obama and a McCain joke thread. Just another example of an intentional mechanism to slight Ron Paul.
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Aug 18 2008, 02:21 PM
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#5
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 3rd Stringer Group: Members Posts: 3,063 Joined: 12-June 07 From: Diverse City Member No.: 372 DaBucks: 27,805 Fave Player: Sayers, Vasher, Singletary, Butkus, Hester, Payton |
ron paul will eat your children
-------------------- Well, maybe I'm just Lucky...............
Hillary 08 - She's not as bad as(s) you think. |
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Aug 21 2008, 11:48 PM
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#6
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 3rd Stringer Group: Members Posts: 2,004 Joined: 13-March 08 Member No.: 981 DaBucks: 6,067 Fave Player: Wrecks Grossman - Comedian |
Going after the female demographic...
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Aug 22 2008, 12:34 PM
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#7
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 Probowler Group: Members Posts: 9,192 Joined: 15-June 07 From: Under your bed! Member No.: 389 DaBucks: 1,189,263,367 |
QUOTE(Loki520 @ Aug 22 2008, 12:48 AM) Going after the female demographic... ROFL!!! -------------------- <====3
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Aug 22 2008, 01:31 PM
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#8
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Probowler Group: Members Posts: 9,806 Joined: 14-January 07 From: Sitting at my computer, dumbass. Member No.: 8 DaBucks: 2,185,279,234 Fave Player: TG's brother |
Wow, I think my chest might be darker than Obama's.
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Aug 24 2008, 10:49 PM
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#9
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 3rd Stringer Group: Members Posts: 2,319 Joined: 3-January 08 From: Nobody gives a fuck. Member No.: 842 DaBucks: 1,817 Fave Player: Huggy Bear |
OMG, with his shirt off - he's a white man!
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Oct 11 2008, 10:04 AM
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#10
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 Practice Squad Group: Members Posts: 1,401 Joined: 23-June 07 From: Fayetteville NC Member No.: 425 DaBucks: 5,280 Fave Player: Walter Payton |
QUOTE(trackguy @ Aug 22 2008, 02:31 PM) Wow, I think my chest might be darker than Obama's. Thats what I thought when I saw the picture too. Thats one white black guy. -------------------- Debate is one thing. Losing love for your country is another.
Bad Spellers Untie!!! |
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Oct 11 2008, 10:13 PM
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#11
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3rd Stringer Group: Members Posts: 2,004 Joined: 13-March 08 Member No.: 981 DaBucks: 6,067 Fave Player: Wrecks Grossman - Comedian |
QUOTE(irishways @ Oct 12 2008, 12:04 AM) Thats what I thought when I saw the picture too. Thats one white black guy. Racist prick. How dare you talk about his dual tone -------------------- |
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Oct 14 2008, 05:39 PM
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#12
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 Team Mascot Group: Members Posts: 640 Joined: 16-January 07 Member No.: 100 DaBucks: 2,700 Fave Player: Walter Payton / Brian Urlacher |
One day a fourth-grade teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living.
All the typical answers came up -- fireman, mechanic, businessman, salesman, doctor, lawyer, and so forth. However, little Justin was being uncharacteristically quiet, so when the teacher prodded him about his father, he replied, 'My father's an exotic dancer in a gay cabaret and takes off all his clothes in front of other men and they put money in his underwear. Sometimes, if the offer is really good, he will go home with some guy and stay with him all night for money.' The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the other children to work on some exercises and then took little Justin aside to ask him, 'Is that really true about your father?' 'No', the boy said, 'He works for the Democratic National Committee and is trying to get Barack Obama elected to be our next President, but I was too embarrassed to say that in front of the class.' |
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